Million Miles

My ventilator. Read, comment and judge me not.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

I'm sorry people, I've been unable to provide non-stop entertainment. That is so because my stomach refuses to co-operate. It has not only left its only function of digesting food but doesn't even allow anything inside. Last night I threw up thrice. Just imagine...

Standing on the sink at 3:45 am with untied, messy hair and a sick taste in the mouth I felt so unsophisticated and...pregnant. Is that how pregnant women feel during the first 3 months? The only sane thought to cross my mind during the whole time. And yes that was a rhetorical question.

This is a far-fetched dream but one day, I will kill nausea.

The other day I was wondering about what I want to be and how I would like to end up. And just so you know, I hardly ever give a thought to my future because it doesn't seem so glamourous and kinda makes me sad. I've never had a burning desire to BE something. Just some degree in some college would do as long as I enjoy what I'm doing. My real interest is in bubble writing but after realising that it doesn't even fit in a decent category of 'hobbies' I stopped pursuing it. Why don't we have a special degree teaching different types of 'writing styles'? I know its an absolutely useless degree but then its also a wonderful way of wasting time.

Anyway, we're all being abused by the universe but I am more because I have a bad stomach and a mind that cannot think straight and has fantasies of killing nausea. No wonder I'm thinking about my future. What a life.

posted by Niqabi at 7:29 AM

3 Comments:

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8:20 AM

Anonymous said...

this buddy surf guy is such a looozaaa - anyhow, i really hope you get well soon. thinking of u as always, girly! lotsha luv-

2:12 PM

Niqabi said...

Jazakallah for all the prayers and kind words. For once in my life, I'm actually making an effort to study *hard* so i wont be blogging for a while.

Zainab and aisha, you're probably both going to your universities by sept. or something? Its sad how summer holidays are ending...I dont want them to prolong, no, and I don't want them to end either. Weird but it makes sense when you dont like both home and school :)

This year will be hard. Let's see.
Take care all, luv y'all.

salams

12:44 AM